I want to complain about people who come here for free advice from yours truly and then go off to another thread and complain about it.

I want to complain about people who buy cheap duct tape instead of real Duck Tape. I also want to complain about people whose last or first name is Duck. I keep getting phone calls asking for you people. It's beginning to impact on my sales record.

I wanna complain about that old hideous battle-axe nosey woman who killed off the aliens in the Paranoia Files. Hell, that was the only reason I came here usually. I like aliens. Leave it to wrinkled up old busy bodies like her to screw up something that ain't broke.

I want to say...........

I hate it when people refer to a group of people
" like talking here even," and some one mentions ..........

-you guys - gee , I am not a guy ! Isn't there a better
way to say that ?

That's why I always say "you folks". Nobody can complain about that. (Yeah, I know. That's a dream.)

Oh, I don't know. We often use words asexually--like mankind. My wife says "you guys" to groups of people--even entirely female groups--and BELIEVE ME she does not countenance sexism in any form. She also gets on my case for saying "so-and-so, that' instead of "so-and-so, who" (People are not things!) It is one of her favorite rants.

What do you do or say that sends your significant-other (notice the PC choice of words?) off into a rant?

Aliens don't kill! She was abducted and taken on a vacation to Vega (the star, not the desert gambling land). Don't worry, she will be returned..

I want to compain about being too polically correct. It often goes to exremes

There is a certain type of grass that grows along the freeways in our area. Its sole reason for existence seems to be to grow, go to seed and die. And it's hell for someone with allergies!

I'm sure a better job could be found for it, but I don't know what. I know it probably feeds birds and the long-tailed critters who live among its sheaths, but couldn't it do all that without being a bane to the allergy prone? Or maybe it could be cultivated and woven into baskets?

I'd like to complain about inferior after dinner mints at some restaurants in this town. After a good meal a person should have the right to expect a quality after dinner mint, but that is usually not the case. Isn't there an after dinner mint office up at the FDA? I'll find out and fax them a list of inferior after dinner mint places.

I'd also like to complain about nurses in the ER who suck their teeth when they are drawing blood from my arm. It's not enough to be in the ER with chest pains, but do I have to also listen to someone suck their teeth? Damn!

Now I want to complain about gasoline being so cheap in the USA. Is it really fair for us to be paying only $3.60 or even $4.00 a gallon when the Brits and the Italians are paying what, $7.00-$9.50 a gallon for regular unleaded? Why are we so special in the world? Is it because we are such a morally upright nation and they are all heathen idolators? What gives? I say if the Brits have to pay that much for gas then we should too. They are our allies remember?