I can certainly sympathize with your situation, Duckie. (Actually, I have NO idea what his situation is, but I've learned that nodding your head up and down and seeming to "agree" often prevents violence or at least, an ugly scene) I know a lot of people believe my actual name is "Ray" since that would be a natural assumption, given the nature of the world and such. But they would be wrong. "Ray" is just my online name. My real name is "Hot_Boi_4_U_69" (sigh) My parents had a weird sense of humor.

A man named Mr. Duck lives inside a volcano in the state of California and rides a medium pink tricycle with his friends. Ok.

A man with a duck on his head walks into a plastic surgeon's office. The Doctor asks, "May I help you?"

And the Duck says, "Can you remove this unsightly growth from my butt?"

I have two ducks that I use as an alarm clock.

They wake me up at the quack of dawn.

Hello Mr. Ductape

You look nice. I'm finally able to match a name with a face, and what a nice face you have.

You're confused. Mr. Duck and Mr. Ducttape are two different characters.

A woman walks into a bar and the bartender says "Hey, where'd you get the pig?"
The woman says "This isn't a pig, it's a duck."
And the bartender says "No, I was talking to the duck!"

Q: What do you call a cat that swallows a duck?
A: A duck-filled-fatty-puss

Is this the same Mr Duck who we had around back in the early part of 2000?