You know, now that I think about it, this is beginning to make a lot of sense. The Russians are definitely up to something. They have just been too cocky here lately, and this Putin guy is way out there in left field. Do they plan on taking back all those countries that were once part of the old Soviet Union? Having Putin as a leader is kinda like if we had one of the Godfathers from the mafia as our president.

KFC is owned by the ku Klux Klan and they have been putting chemicals in their chicken. These chems make African American men impotent.

Archaeologists recently discovered a huge cat library in Egypt near where the pyramids are located. Thousands of manuscripts were stored inside sealed clay vessels. Cat mummies were also found, along with a large blue stone of wisdom once used by the Pharoah's magician.
The discovery is being kept secret because the Egyptian government does not want people to start buying and hoarding millions of cats.

The earth's magnetic poles keep shifting due to deep underground Chinese Iridium mining operations. The Chinese have disccovered a huge deposit of Iridium nodules 5 miles beneath the earth's surface, and are removing the ore which is so hot it has to be cooled before it is brought to the surface.