Maybe she's hiding under the bed? lol

Mary was abducted for her own protection and well being. She is currently being held in a secure location and as soon as it is safe for her to return to Bakersfield, she will be released. Until then, it would be nice if some nice Foolmooner would volunteer to babysit her cat which was accidentally abducted.

Aliens are allergic to cats. The animal is being kept in an aluminum foil lined cage. Mary would like to return to FoolMoon, but right now that is impossible for reasons I cannot go into. She is being well treated.

If she's with you Jazzy, I know for a fact she's being well treated!

Prove that you have Mary. Go ahead, prove she is a captive. Ha! Just as I thought. Anyone can make such a claim. Our Mary was no pushover. However if you do have her, I suggest you release her at once. She always wore her aluminum foil hat and carried odorless mothballs on her person to protect against alien abduction.

Be warned, Jazmoora....Mary is a highly trained linguist with the ability to destroy alien mnemonic function. If that happens, you'll be completely disfunctional in the earth environment where enhanced memory is essential for survival. She is a very powerful woman, and will never be a submissive and obedient sex zombie like Tenderheart and...what was the other woman's name?

(whispers) She's back.... I've *seen* her!

I'm *sure* it was her... at least... it *looks* like her....


But I trust no-one.

Ha ha...very funny. I know she's back. I responded to her post already on one of the other boards. I'm not 100% certain if she is the REAL Mary yet. Time will tell. She seems to be mellowed some. Looks are deceiving. If it is Mary, I'll know shortly. If it's an imposter, I'll know that as well. So far she's only posted in the Interfaith threads...not like her to post there about religion...obviously she is still traumatized from her experience in the relationship folder. When she rips into the complaint thread a few times, I'll feel more confident about her alleged return.

Yeah, but... but... this unexplained disappearance.... the unaccounted for time. What about THAT Wake? Are you just going to make excuses for her? Let her off the hook?

Perhaps she's one of (gulp) theirs now. (looks around furtively) Is anyone listening to this? Are we safe here...? Listen -- you know she thought she was too smart to wear silver foil. You know she thought she was better than all of us. What if... what if... I don't like to think about it.

Can you devise a good test? So that we KNOW? But then again, what would that prove, because we all know that I...

Trust no-one.

Who's making excuses? It's not all that unusual for people to simply disappear here at Foolmoon and not leave behind a trace. It's also not all that unusual for them to show up again a year or two later acting strange and sounding like another person entirely....and with the same name and the same avatar. I could name names and cite such examples but I won't. I mean, I wouldn't want anyone to suddenly launch into a long-winded literary discussion about Paradise Lost or The Odyssey...code for a deranged poster.

Anyone could download an avatar and repost it under an assumed user name which happened to be very close or even the same as the previous user name they used previously on numerous occasions. It happens more than we like to admit, whoever we are.

She was indeed too smart to wear silver foil which is why I recommended she use aluminum foil instead. I can't believe you said what you did about Mary thinking she was better than the rest of us. She was from Bakersfield for God's sake. She drove a Honda Civic with a floor shift. Her cat wasn't even neutered. Her Birkenstocks were 20 years old. Her hair was the color of steel wool. Better than we are? Gah! That's a stretch, Helice. Sounds to me like someone is jealous of a certain other person's linguistic prowess.

AM NOT!

Hey, it's me.

You know, I feel like a mushroom most of the time, kept in the dark, fed manure, you know.

But I guess I'm starting to act like a mushroom, too. Popping up unannounced, mushrooming into something enormous but actually lacking in real nutrition or substance, and then mysteriously disappearing as quickly as I appeared, probably giving the unlucky individual who chooses to digest me gas or stomach upset. Oh well.
Life as a mushroom. Sigh.